Public/Private

When you live with someone who yells, hits, screams, beats, and routinely threatens death, it's always...interesting...to be out in public and have an aquaintance tell you how wonderful the yeller, hitter, screamer, beater is.

What do you say to that? What do you say when someone says 'Your Daddy/Husband/Boyfriend is such a great guy! It must be so wonderful having them as a Father/Husband/Boyfriend!'

You could tell them the truth, but who really wants to hear that? You could agree with them, but that's a lie that sticks in the throat. You could laugh hysterically at the difference between their perception and your reality, but then they'll think you're crazy and go away feeling even more respect for your Father/Husband/Boyfriend for having to put up with you. Or, worst of all, you start to wonder if they're right, you're wrong, you really do live with a great guy, you're the problem.

The thing is abusers look normal. They're your minister, your doctor, your psychologist, your lawyer, your cop, your real estate guy. It would be easier if they all looked like future guests of the Jerry Springer Show, then you could avoid them.