Either or

Say I have two options for my marriage...

Option 1: My husband fucks someone else. He doesn't really know her. He doesn't love her. He sees her once She's likable, but he doesn't know her well enough to like her. Other than as a nice memory of a fun adventure, he doesn't remember her. Doesn't remember her name. Can't really remember what she looked like. He thinks she had dark hair. Kind of longish.

Option 2: My husband is best friends with another woman. He talks to her every day. He tells her hopes, wishes, and dreams. He knows hers.

When he's with me, he sees things that remind him of her. When he goes on vacation with me, he thinks of how much fun it would be to see that place with her. When he's in the shower in the morning, he thinks of her. When he's in bed next to me, he thinks of her.

He lies to me by omission every minute of every hour of every day for over ten years. He has known for ten years that the minute he walked away from me he could walk into another life with a woman that adores him. And he never warned me that was even a possibility.

They have cybersex, text sex, phone sex, they wear clothes that they select and purchase for one another. Every business trip he goes on she calls him and wakes him up each morning and they talk each night before he falls asleep. She knows how he cums, when he cums, what makes him hard instantly.

But he doesn't fuck her.

Because he's being 'faithful'.

Because he doesn't want to hurt me.

Because he values his marriage.

And he doesn't see what's upsetting about all that.

I'd pick what's behind Door Number 1.