Over and Over Again

The first sure sign is the email, cross posted to every known addy, "Where are you when I need you... I feel like i'm in crisis again". This is not from a husband, lover, or best girlfriend. This is from the person who is rarely there when I need him but is always there, about every six months, when he's running his life in a ditch.

Since I've been down this road at least a half dozen times, and have decided I'm not taking this trip again, as soon as he popped up with sentence after sentence of the old rants I told him (again!) that his problems were beyond my ability to deal with and I thought he needed a psychiatrist for a proper diagnosis and treatment. He responds that 2 therapists have said they don't think he's bipolar so he doesn't need to do that. Since I know he lies to his therapists routinely and that they have seen him at most 10 hours a year and I've heard him go on for 10 hours a day, I'm not too impressed.

And I predicted what he would do "You're going to push things in your relationship until you've created a breakup, then you'll be devastated because you can't live without her, tell me how you can't sleep, can't stop crying, don't want to live anymore, and expect me to get her to forgive you."

Twenty-four hours later, right on schedule, there's been the breakup, he's 'devastated', and I'm insensitive because I don't feel his pain adequately and won't make an effort to fix it.

When he gets like this I don't think he hears anything that's said to him. He just spins faster and faster till he's done and everyone around him is exhausted and fed up and then he wonders why everyone doesn't forgive him and welcome him back with loving arms. He doesn't understand why his woman can't just get over it and why she gets further away from him. Btw, his excuse for these month-long tantrums is that he senses a distance between them. No kidding.