Memories...

Recently a friend asked for my Top Ten Most Memorable Moments.

No one wants to hear my memories. They could bring the room down real fast.

I remember begging my father to not cut my mother's throat.

I remember beatings and rapes and terror and loneliness so deep it felt like I would never connect with another person again.

So when people start talking about the good old days I nod and smile and search for some happy or neutral moment I can share if the discussion works it's way to me.

I always wonder if their memories are really that happy, or do they have the dark places inside that they don't share either?